In the smoke-filled trenches of America’s border wars, Chicago Mayor Brandon Johnson just lobbed a live grenade into the fray, screeching that conservatives are itching for a “rematch of the Civil War” as federal agents clean house in his sanctuary sewer. Fresh off signing an executive order carving out “ICE-free zones” on city turf—banning feds from using public spaces as raid bases, processing hubs, or even parking lots—Johnson framed Trump’s deportation surge as nothing less than a Southern revival. “I say very candidly that the right wing in this country wants a rematch of the Civil War,” he thundered at a Monday presser, pausing for dramatic effect like a bad community theater audition. “I want that to set in right now because the President of the United States of America has declared war on the people of Chicago and people across America.”
This isn’t hyperbole from a mayor under siege; it’s the desperate yelp of a Democrat overlord whose “progressive” paradise is crumbling under the weight of unchecked illegals, gangbangers, and his own feckless fealty to the cartel cash cow. Johnson’s order, set to slap “No ICE Allowed” signs on everything from parks to precincts within five days, is the latest spit in the eye of federal law—explicitly barring agents from staging ops on city soil amid a blitz that’s already deported hundreds of Tren de Aragua thugs, Sinaloa runners, and Latin Kings enforcers who’ve turned the Windy City into a narco nightmare. Signs will blare: “This property is owned and/or controlled by the City of Chicago. It may not be used for civil immigration enforcement, including as a: Staging area, Processing location, Operations base.” Translation? “Catch your criminals elsewhere, Uncle Sam—we’re busy virtue-signaling.”
The timing couldn’t be more tone-deaf. Just days after a Brighton Park bloodbath where armed rioters—emboldened by Johnson’s sanctuary schtick—rammed ICE vans and got lit up in self-defense, with Chicago PD ordered to twiddle thumbs on distress calls, the mayor’s doubling down on defiance. Remember Marimar Martinez, the doxxing darling who plowed her SUV into a federal rig while packing heat? Or Juan Espinoza Martinez, the Latin Kings shot-caller nabbed for slapping a $10K bounty on ICE boss Gregory Bovino’s head? That’s the “people of Chicago” Johnson claims Trump is warring against—gangland goons and migrant mobs who’ve jacked up murders, fentanyl floods, and street-level terror while blue-city brass like him play footsie with open borders.
Johnson’s Civil War cosplay isn’t just unhinged; it’s a grotesque rewrite of history from a guy whose party fired the first shots in 1861 to cling to chains, only to pivot to modern-day peonage via cheap illegal labor propping up Democrat donors from agribusiness to construction cartels. He’s accusing the “extreme right” of rejecting abolition’s fruits while his own edicts greenlight anarchy: volunteers “putting themselves at risk of being shot and killed by the federal government,” as he put it, code for agitators blocking raids and shielding sex traffickers. The White House fired back swift and savage, dubbing the order “SICK” and a blatant thumb on the scale for lawlessness.
With National Guard boots hitting Illinois dirt to back ICE’s Operation Midway Blitz—rounding up the worst of the worst amid protests turning into pitched battles—Johnson’s rhetoric is less leadership than last rites for his failed regime. He’s not building “greater resistance,” as he claims; he’s barricading a blue bunker against the rule of law, inviting escalation where stand-downs morph into shootouts. Breitbart’s John Nolte nailed it: Democrats like Johnson are the ones waging “hot civil war” via Antifa allies and sanctuary sedition, all to hoard their undocumented underclass. Gateway Pundit’s Cullen Linebarger? “Will someone please tell him that it was DEMOCRATS who started the Civil War and Republicans who freed the slaves?”
Chicago’s not a battlefield for ideological rematches—it’s ground zero for the real fight: sovereignty versus surrender. Johnson’s “ICE-free” fever dream won’t stop the feds; it’ll just paint a bigger target on his back, forcing more Guard deployments and deeper federal footprints. Mr. Mayor, your “war” is self-inflicted—drop the Confederate cosplay, unleash your cops, and let ICE do their job. Or keep howling about phantom rebellions while your city burns. History’s watching, and it remembers who waves the white flag first.
Compiled from breaking wires and the X echo chamber amplifying Johnson’s meltdown.
